Divorce was one of those things that was never going to happen to me…like NEVER in a million years. And if someone had told me that I would be on my own as a single mum for 10 years, I would have said…no way, not a chance, not going to happen!
This was not meant to be my story.
I met my husband when I was 22 while we were both working for the same church. I had purposefully not dated and had “waited for the right one”, played by the rules and ticked all the boxes, naively thinking that this would somehow guarantee me a blessed, happy, life-long marriage. Don’t get me wrong, I in no way regret any of the choices I made, but my faith was in my own goodness (which was actually self-righteousness!) not in God’s goodness…which I was soon to experience in so many ways.
After six years of marriage and two beautiful boys, my husband had met someone else and would ultimately leave me for her. When it all came to light, our marriage was over almost immediately. In the months leading up to this, there were signs. I knew deep down something was very wrong and that our marriage was in grave trouble. I didn’t know what was happening but I just remember desperately praying, “GOD YOU HAVE TO FIX THIS!!” I never would have imagined He would instead allow it to finish.
I remember sitting in church alone, feeling heartbroken and confused, and felt God tell me that our marriage would soon be over…NO.GOD.NO!!! My heart knew it to be true but my head couldn’t accept or even imagine it. I was filled with shame and fear…a failed marriage…how could I face people?! The thought of our beautiful children, only 2 years and 6 months old, not growing up in a whole family, not having their dad walk through the door at night or being there for every milestone was the most devastating part of all. Every ideal about marriage and family I’d held so dearly was crumbling away.
It was just a few weeks later I found “that text” and our marriage was suddenly over. Yet through all the pain, hurt and confusion was an underlying peace and calm I could not explain. What at first seemed like my worst nightmare come true became the beginning of a journey from brokenness to wholeness and in trusting God like I’d never had to before…
I am hoping my story and the things I’ve learned along the way can help and encourage those going through or living with the aftermath of divorce, single parenting or moving on to a new beginning. Sadly, divorce and broken families is something that touches us all in some way or another and that’s why I’ve started this blog to let you or your loved one know THERE IS HOPE.
I want to be very careful to always respect my former husband and his partner and all other parties involved. This blog will be about MY story and the keys, principles and values God showed me through it all in the hope to encourage others going through the same.
I am now re-married after 10 years on my own and have been blessed with a loving (spunky!) husband and 3 more amazing kids. But the journey doesn’t end there as happily ever after…re-marriage and blending a family is a whole new level of trials and navigating through challenges – fun and games!
I look forward to sharing more of my story and some of the “jewels & pearls” of wisdom I’ve learnt (often times through mistakes!) with you.